The Freakshow
by Vanity Storm
Summary: a 'Freakshow' in London owned by Erskine who is evil, eventual Valduggery, slight spoilers for book 4 and up, rated T to be safe, Valkyrie is possessed, Tanith swallows swords, ghastly is cursed with scars, Finbar is outrageously tattooed and Skulduggery well he's alive and has flesh, lots of it but parts of him are translucent... anyways R&R there will be a better summary soon
1. Chapter 1

The rain was coming down heavy as Valkyrie navigated the streets within Bethnal green. She was still familiarising herself with the layout of the suburb having only been a resident within its confines for the past month.

It was after her guardian and dear uncle Gordon had passed away, an acquaintance of his by the name of Erskine Ravel had offered her lodgings and welfare in the form of a, though minuscule, income.

There was of course one catch to his generous hospitality. Valkyrie would have to be displayed to the public as part of the numerous and varied exhibitions within Erskine's freak show as, the girl possessed by an evil spirit-most likely the devil.

Valkyrie had been given to her uncle Gordon by her parents when she was but three years of age due to this strange demonic behaviour within herself. Her uncle had been a medical researcher and journalist of human or more accurately mortal and as she later found out non mortal ailments and diseases, thus explaining his close work with Erskine and also the slight animosity found between the two especially on the topic of his favourite niece and the display of the sick and deformed.

This animosity though, not being enough to free her from the grasp of Erskine's business.

She entered through the small door way around the back of the freak shows building on Squrries street. She climbed the rickety stairs to the top level depositing the groceries she had been asked to purchase by Mrs Grouse.

Mrs Grouse was a lovely old women with wispy white hair drawn up in a lose bun, her violet eyes shining brightly out of dull withered skin. She was the culinary and domestic Genius within the freak shown and was in charge of seeing to everyone's needs and was truly the cogs of the whole operation. Without her there truly was no way forward.

Mrs Grouse had come to the establishment over twenty years ago. Her husband Kenspeckle, had been in charge of the monetary funds and basic health care, until his unfortunate death three years prior from cholera.

Valkyrie exited the quarters of Mrs Grouse and descended the stairs to the corridor of rooms located on the first level. Each room housed a member of the freak shows exhibitions.

She reached the end of the long narrow corridor and came to the grey door of her good friend's room. Muffled voices could be heard coming from the other side. She knocked three times and waited patiently. The voices ceased and footsteps approached the handle of the door turn down as it was pulled open.

"Valkyrie Cain!" the person said. "Come in, We were just discussing the new recruit."

She slipped in under the arm of her friend and looked to see who else was seated within his room.

On the bed swinging her legs jovially over the edge sat Tanith Low 'the woman who swallowed swords' her blonde hair dangling over her lean frame. Beside her, on the floor leaning against the leg of the bed his selves rolled to show his skin was Ghastly bespoke 'the famous scared man'

Sitting to the right of the room was another person Finbar Wrong 'The tattooed freak.'

She felt a nudge at her shoulder and then a voice whisper in her ear.

"go on sit down silly."

She nodded and moved towards the bed setting herself next to Tanith.

Peering up at her friend Skulduggery Pleasant ' the human skeleton' so named due to the fact that patches of his skin and muscle were translucent to the point where you were staring directly at bone.

"As I was saying." Finbar said clearing his throat. "We have a new recruit! A boy a few years older than yourself Valkyrie, a twenty year old by the name of Fletcher Renn."

"Where'd Ravel find 'im" Ghastly grunted out.

"Not too sure I think Kenspeckle's niece said he was found around Potts Row." Everyone understanding that Kenspeckle was the code name for Mrs Grouse, Her niece was a bubbly and slightly loopy 18 year old by the name of Clarabelle who had more than once spoken about turning her hair a bright shade of blue.

Tanith stuck her hand up eagerly imitating a small child.

"Yes Tanith?" Skulduggery's smooth voice gave her permission to speak.

"What's he in for?" Tanith asked.

Valkyries friends had been part of the freak show for quite a few years. Skulduggery though relatively young was one of the first exhibits and had a close friendship with Erskine.

Ghastly, was a childhood friend of Skulduggery's and after having spent most of his youth travelling from country to country with his rich parents in search of a cure to his mysterious scarring, had been sent back to London to be placed in the care of Erskine Ravel and become part of his show of freaks

Shortly after Ghastly settled into his routine Tanith had turned up with her cousin Finbar Wrong seeking employment and a form of income. They'd been part of the business for at least three years from about the time Mr Grouse passed away.

Due to the long period of time all of them had spent within the freak shows walls they had begun to refer to it as a prison of one kind or another.

"I heard he's one of those mysterious cases, you know the ones they keep under wraps till you pay to see 'em" Ghastly spoke picking absent-mindedly at the leg of Skulduggery's bed with his finger nail.

"Well no matter, dinner will be shortly and we can see him then." Skulduggery said jovially, seating himself on the other side of the bed, his back brushing against Valkyries leg making her blush. "Now onto other more important stuff, what groceries did you buy dear Valkyrie? For as you know that will determine our dinner for tonight."


	2. Caelan the Sappy Romantic

**Hello people**

**special thanks to my lovely introductory reviews for the first chapter of this story **

**PhobbyWriter**

**Fluorissa Rose**

**Louisiana Stephenic**

**and **

**Rosalie Storm **

**( oh hey... same last name epic :D) **

**anyways hope you guys like this chapter and the cheeky bantering... i know it's not especially long but ahh well... **

** ENJOY :D**

**oh and an IMPORTANT note: **

**this is set in England so for all intents and purposes everyone is British/english... rather than being Irish :D just so the story line of a freakshow works and remember its AU **

**thanks  
**

After listing off the groceries Valkyrie had bought that day from the Hibernian markets and determining that dinner would be the usual, pea soup with mash.

"Lovely, solid meal." Skulduggery said sarcastically. "Couldn't you convince the old prune to cook something better?" He smirked mischievously at Valkyrie and then winced when Finbar clubbed him over the head.

"Oi, be nice to the poor dear Skul, she's just doing her best." Valkyrie blushed out of embarrassment not completely sure whether Finbar was defending her or Mrs Grouse, but concluding that it would most likely have been the later, considering his fondness for Clarabelle.

The next hour passed by quite quickly filled with gossip and general conversation. It had just hit six in the evening when there was a timid knock on the outside of Skulduggery's door. They all fell silent as the person on the other side cleared their throat.

"Mrs Grouse says it's time for dinner." The gruff voice called. Valkyrie thought she recognised the voice and her guess was confirmed when skulduggery replied saying

"Thank you Caelan you may tell Mrs Grouse we will be up in just a moment."

Valkyrie shuddered, Caelan though a nice looking man was slightly obsessive and took the notion of romancing to an intolerable level. She had received on many occasions poems expressing his desire and love for her, which had been laughed over with her friends before Skulduggery, attempting to hold back tears of mirth threw them into a fireplace and chuckled as he coaxed them to ashes.

"Who should I say is with you?" Caelan called through the door once again.

"Oh the usual suspects, Tanith, Finbar, Ghastly, Valkyrie and I." Skulduggery said giving a wink to Valkyrie.

Sure enough Caelan called again. "Miss Cain is in there with you? Did she get my Poem?" He asked his voice eager.

Valkyrie groaned quietly rolling her eyes and burying her head in her arms.

"Oh yes." Skulduggery jeered in reply. "Something about hearts intertwined and beating as one in the eternal Garden of Eden with your ponies and unicorns, or something similar to that." Skulduggery rattled off in an airy voice.

Ghastly attempted to hold down his need to laugh as he watched Tanith slowly dissolve into a shivering mess of silent laughing. Finbar looked amused and rolled his eyes in skulduggery's direction.

Valkyrie's head rose from her lap as she stared at skulduggery in disbelief. "I hope you realise what you've done." She whispered sharply glaring at Skulduggery's grinning face.

"Don't you worry darling I've got it all under control." He whispered back giving her a smouldering smile to tease her. Valkyrie hid her head back in her arms as she felt her cheeks heat till they were sure to be blushing scarlet.

"D…did she like it?" Caelan hesitantly asked.

Putting on posh accent skulduggery replied

"Hmm… I think so, but you may have to ask her yourself my dear man, at dinner, now hurry along and tell Mrs Grouse we are on our way."

They heard Caelan's foot falls fade into the distance and as soon as they were out of ear shot Tanith broke out into a fit of cackling which was soon followed by the deep raspy chuckle of ghastly.

"Unicornssss…. And… p...pppponies." screeched Tanith, fanning her face which had gone beet red. "Oh Skul, excellent purely excellent."

"Yes, I do think it was quite capital." Skulduggery said proudly standing to dust off his brown and scruffy jacket. "But I do think we should really be getting to dinner, won't want to disappoint him by not showing up, and know would we… Miss Cain?" he teased raising an eyebrow in her direction. Valkyrie looked up and met his gaze. Skulduggery winked holding out his hand. "Mustn't keep him waiting."

Valkyrie pursed her lips and stood hastily she jabbed him in the shoulder "shut up you cocky bastard." She said jokingly before heading out of his room and up the stairs to dinner.

* * *

**might take a few weeks to update again due to it being near Christmas and all... and i have alot of shifts at work currenlty... should actually be getting ready for work now... **

**so ill leave you be :D**

**please review and tell me what you think... :)**


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